In Perek 14 Pasuk 1,the first pasuk of rivi’i, the pasuk says “בָּנִים אַתֶּם לַי־הֹוָ־ה אֱלֹהֵיכֶם לֹא תִתְגֹּדְדוּ וְלֹא תָשִׂימוּ קָרְחָה בֵּין עֵינֵיכֶם “ “You are children of Hashem, your God. You shall neither cut yourselves nor make any baldness between your eyes for the dead.”
The obvious question is, how come these two actions are directly associated with being God’s children? Of all the things that you can think of, are these the two you would have picked? The answer is that the pasuk is referring to when people would die in those days, the goyim would cut themselves and tear out their hair in grief.
The Seforno says a very nice idea that since we are children of Hashem, we are guaranteed a portion in Olam Habah, the World to Come. Because of this there is no reason to have to show your grief outwardly over a death. The deceased is in a much better place than we are. I think the Seforno is saying that if you show too much grief, you are showing a lack of belief in this principle. Grief is obviously expected in this situation, but the bottom line must be that you believe the deceased is much better off than they were in Olam Hazeh.
The Ibn Ezra says something very powerful. Once you know that Hashem is your Father and that he loves you more than any human father possibly could, then you cannot cut yourself over a death or anything bad that happens. Everything Hashem does is for the good! When a parent does not let a child have something that he really wants, do we say that he is a bad parent? No. We assume that the parent knows what’s best for his child. And just like a little child doesn’t understand what his father is doing is good for him, he just trusts his father implicitly, so too we must trust Hashem even without understanding his actions.
We must show that we are different from the goyim who do not recognize the good in everything and therefore, get so lost in their grief that they physically harm themselves. We cannot be like that for we are Hashem’s children and how sad is it when a child cannot or does not trust their father? Current events do not appear to bode well for the Jewish people, however, we must keep our bitachon and trust that no matter what happens, Hashem is leading us in the right direction.